Thriving Through Traumas and Adversities

Intro

How do you overcome the traumas of your past? How do you break free from family traditions and expectations that are not helpful? Let’s learn from Dr. Tapati Duttta, a living symbol of resiliency, who joins us for this Thriving Lesson.

Guest Bio

Dr. Tapati Duttta is an assistant professor at Fort Lewis College and a social scientist in community health. She has a Ph.D. in Public Health from Indiana University and has spoken at TEDx.

Q: Can you share a bit about your early life?

One of the major events of my childhood was the blindness of my father. When I was a little girl, my father could see and had a good job. However, after a poorly done surgery, he slowly began to lose his vision until it was completely gone. I became a caregiver to my father, and that encompassed much of my childhood.

Following that, my family struggled with finances. In a patriarchal environment, it is very difficult for a woman to get a job, and my extended family refused to let my mother go out and work. That just was not proper in our society. Because of that, I could not take many of my school exams since the exam fees were not paid.

As I was finishing my schooling, my father died. And he died of suicide, which has a serious mark in the communities where I come from. On top of that, we had to live in a very run-down area until my mother started working, which came with a whole host of challenges.

These experiences in my childhood seared into me this uneasy feeling. We never knew what tomorrow would hold, or even if there would be a tomorrow. But we survived, even if we had to break social norms to do it. I think that has actually made me as questioning and resilient as I am today.

Q: Did you have a mentor during those times?

Some of the credit goes to my schoolteachers and my school friends. They would suggest potential paths for me to take, stay late after school to help me with my schoolwork, and were just there to help and support me. For example, I did not know which colleges to apply to. At first, I only applied to five Ivy League schools. Then a teacher saw that and guided me to another friend who could actually show me different colleges where the competition wasn’t as tough. Help and mentorship came from several places for me.

Q: How did you end up in public health?

Because I was a very good student, I was trying to get into the med schools. However, because of my family’s financial struggles, I could not afford to take the entrance exams. I was very resentful because of that. I kept thinking, “Why should a poor person with my grades not be able to attend schools?” Eventually, I had enough money to pay for one entrance exam at one med school. And I passed! But through some bad advice from family, I lost confidence in my ability to pay for books and tuition and left the school. I kept getting forms from local colleges, but I was so exhausted and discouraged that I wouldn’t even look at them.

One day, a friend came up to me and said, “You need to find work to feed your family. There is a course on social work that will lead to a good job as soon as you pass.” I didn’t know what social work actually meant, but I knew that I like to work with people. I thought that could lead to work I liked, so I agreed to take the course. And I ended up enjoying the work and decided to make it my career.

Q: What do you say to people who think they don’t deserve to have success because of a difficult past?

Opportunities don’t lie around. You have to find your opportunity. Don’t push yourself too hard, but keep moving. Don’t stop! How opportunities arise, you cannot know. Your success may be just behind the next struggle. Hope is the last thing that dies, so don’t lose hope.

Summary

It is important to keep your life in perspective. In my case, there are many orphans in the world, but I at least had my mother. I had a rough childhood, but it led me to be resilient. That appreciation for what you do have, and not a focus on what you do not, is what enabled me to live a thriving life, even through tough times.

Watch Video Here: